Look at all those ducks there are at least ten
Well, you’re not wrong.
WHEN BOYS GET ANGRY AND THEIR JAW DOES THE THING
by day i am just a regular loser, by night i am the same loser only it’s nighttime
A baby’s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear. Unless it’s 3am. And you’re home alone. And you don’t have a baby.
how come when someone decides to eat only fruits and vegetables people commend them for their “willpower” and “diligence” but when i decide to eat a diet composed entirely of mozzarella sticks and vodka suddenly i’m “out of control” and “putting myself in danger”
we need some new and more powerful swears
the elder swear
this guy is a guardian of the galaxy
I feel safer already
im alive but only ironically
Why am I awake who summoned me